February 14
More Than My Preference
A group considers changing something we like: the meeting time, the room arrangement, or a familiar format. Our first concern is what we will lose. That is natural enough. We have found something that helps us, and we want it preserved. The trouble starts when our preference becomes the only need we can hear clearly.
Other members may be trying to make the same meeting accessible from different circumstances. Someone works later, cannot hear well, or finds the present arrangement difficult. Their needs do not automatically settle the question, any more than ours do. Common welfare asks for a conversation large enough to include them. We can explain what matters to us without presenting our comfort as the definition of a good meeting. Even if the group ultimately keeps things as they are, we may leave with a more honest appreciation of what other people have been accommodating all along.
Whose experience becomes harder to hear when my preference feels threatened?
There are several lives gathered around this table.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Tradition One.