August 16
The Ordinary Favor
A friend asks for help with something that has no obvious spiritual content. They need a ride, an extra pair of hands, or somebody to wait with them. We may be more eager to discuss their attitude than to spend an inconvenient hour on the actual request. Talking about recovery comes naturally; rearranging a small part of our afternoon feels considerably less appealing.
The usefulness described in Step Twelve reaches beyond having something wise to say. A practical favor may express friendship without requiring a lesson alongside it. We still have limits, and no request becomes an automatic obligation simply because it was made. Yet it is worth noticing when we offer instruction because action would cost us more. Love sometimes has very little to explain. It asks whether we are willing and able to help with the thing the person really needs done.
When do I substitute advice for an ordinary kindness I could reasonably offer?
The favor needs no accompanying sermon.
For the A.A. nerds: Alcoholics Anonymous, “Working With Others,” pp. 96–97; Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Twelve.