May 18
Whose Time Is It?
A meeting runs a few minutes late, and our impatience feels entirely justified. We have things to do. The person speaking seems unaware of everyone else. Yet our reaction may contain more than concern for the schedule. Perhaps we arrived with the expectation that an entire room would arrange itself around the evening we had planned.
Time limits matter, and a chairperson may need to uphold them. We can support that responsibility without silently condemning the person who needs reminding. Ordinary inconvenience can expose how quickly our preferences become rules for other people. It can also remind us that we are free to leave when we must. There is a difference between respecting our time and insisting that nobody ever complicate it. A little honesty about that difference may make our request clearer and our face less hostile when the person finally finishes speaking.
How much of my irritation belongs to the inconvenience, and how much to my expectation?
A practical limit can be enough.
For the A.A. nerds: As Bill Sees It, No. 28, “Troublemakers Can Be Teachers.”