April 27
Who Else Is Involved
We feel ready to tell the whole truth and accept whatever follows. That sounds courageous until we notice how many people are included in whatever follows. A disclosure might expose someone else's private life, unsettle a household, or affect people who had no part in our conduct. Our willingness to suffer does not give us permission to volunteer them for consequences they have not considered.
Step Nine asks for care as well as courage. A sponsor or other appropriate adviser can help us examine actual risks without letting fear supply convenient excuses. Some situations need expertise beyond a sponsor's experience. We may have to slow down, consult those affected where appropriate, and pray for a way forward that takes their welfare seriously. There is no universal speech that resolves every case. Being ready to tell the truth includes being willing to consider whom our telling might injure.
Who might bear consequences of the amends I am preparing to make?
Their welfare belongs in the preparation.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Nine, pp. 86–87; Alcoholics Anonymous, “Into Action,” pp. 79–80.