January 11
The Answer I Cannot Supply
Waiting for someone else's decision can make almost anything seem preferable to waiting. We explain ourselves once more, send another message, or ask a mutual friend what they think. Each move appears reasonable by itself. Together they may reveal how hard we are working to produce an answer that belongs to another person.
There may still be a clear responsibility on our side: providing information, acknowledging a mistake, or stating what we can agree to. Beyond that, repeated effort can become pressure. Accepting the limit does not make the matter unimportant. It means recognizing that the other person's freedom is part of the situation, including their freedom to disappoint us. Prayer may help us endure what further explanation cannot solve. We can remain responsible for our conduct during the wait, even when we have no influence over how long it lasts.
Where have I confused making my position clear with making someone accept it?
Their answer has to remain theirs.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Three, p. 41.