December 28
The Familiar Difficulty
There it is again: the wish to control, the resentment we thought we had settled, the fear that makes us defensive. Recognizing an old difficulty can be discouraging. We may decide that all the work we have done has accomplished very little. We expected progress to mean never finding ourselves in this particular corner again, especially after explaining the way out to somebody else.
A familiar difficulty does not always mean an unchanged life. Perhaps we recognize it sooner, speak about it more honestly, or cause less damage before asking God for help. Those differences deserve an accurate place in inventory alongside what still needs attention. There may also be something new to understand about why we cling to this habit. Returning to a Step is not an admission that the Step failed. It is how we continue using help that was never offered as a single, permanent treatment for being human.
What is different in the way I meet this old difficulty, and what still needs an honest look?
Familiar ground still deserves our attention.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Twelve, pp. 111–114.