November 27
They Did It Well
Watching somebody manage a task we once carried can produce an awkward mixture of gratitude and disappointment. We wanted the work to continue. We also hoped our absence would be noticed. When everything goes smoothly, an unreasonable part of us feels cheated. We might search for a small flaw that restores our private sense of being necessary.
Their competence is good news for a purpose we claim to love. Allowing ourselves to enjoy it may take a little honesty about the other feeling. We do not have to scold ourselves for missing the place we held, or manufacture an enthusiasm we do not yet feel. We can refrain from reducing another person's contribution to protect our own importance. With time, the fact that others can carry the work may become a source of relief. Something valuable has become safer because it depends on more people.
Can I welcome another person's competence even where it makes my own less necessary?
The work has another pair of capable hands.
For the A.A. nerds: The A.A. Service Manual, Appendix E, “The Principle of Rotation.”