August 26
Our Part in the Trouble
A group conflict is often described through the behavior of one difficult member. Their part may be real and serious. Still, the rest of us have choices too: passing along a story, avoiding a necessary conversation, laughing at a cutting remark, or letting somebody else carry the whole problem. It is possible to oppose the disruption while helping the atmosphere around it worsen.
Common welfare asks what each of us contributes to the life we share. That question does not spread equal blame or excuse harmful conduct. It gives us somewhere useful to act without waiting for the most difficult person to change. We can be more accurate in what we repeat, more direct about concerns, and less willing to recruit an audience for contempt. A group's peace is affected by many ordinary exchanges, including the ones that seem too small to count as part of the dispute.
What is within my conduct to change, even if another person's part remains unresolved?
My next conversation is part of our shared life.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Tradition One and Step Ten.