February 3
A Way of Speaking
Kindness can seem like a large quality until we hear ourselves calling someone back. Our tone says they have inconvenienced us before our words say hello. We may be prepared to do exactly what was requested and still make the other person pay for asking. The favor will be delivered, along with a little bill for our resentment.
Practicing a principle includes how we carry it into contact. We are allowed to say that a request is difficult, to offer another time, or to admit that we cannot help. Those answers can be kinder than a grudging agreement whose cost appears later. Faith becomes practical when it influences a voice, a pause, or the willingness to speak plainly. Nobody has to pretend to feel generous every moment. We can simply become interested in whether our manner allows another person to receive what we are supposedly willing to give.
What does my manner add to the help I offer?
Let me answer that more kindly.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Twelve.