January 23
When the Phone Is Busy
The person we usually call cannot answer. Perhaps they are working, resting, or helping somebody else. Our disappointment may quickly turn into a familiar conclusion: nobody is really there for us. One unavailable person becomes evidence about the whole world. Underneath the conclusion, we may simply be frightened of facing the next hour without that particular voice.
A valued relationship can remain important without becoming our only source of help. The fellowship contains other people, other meetings, and experience we have yet to hear. Prayer remains possible even when the person who taught us to pray is unavailable. Reaching more widely can feel awkward, especially if we have grown comfortable with one person's understanding. But it can also spare a friendship a burden it was never meant to carry. Someone can care about us deeply and still have a life that occasionally keeps them from answering.
What happens inside me when the person I rely on is unavailable?
One unanswered call does not mean I have been abandoned.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Step Three, pp. 38–39.