September 27
When Admiration Wavers
The member whose words helped us most says something careless, or behaves in a way we cannot defend. Disappointment can spread quickly. We begin doubting the advice, the meetings, perhaps our own judgment for having trusted any of it. A person who once seemed to prove recovery worked now seems to put the whole thing in question.
It hurts to discover that someone we admire is as unfinished as the rest of us. There may be conduct that requires a response, and admiration should not shield it. But the help we received can still have been real. An honest principle does not lose its value because its messenger fails to live it consistently. Our faith may have an opportunity to grow less dependent on one person's performance. We can grieve the disappointment without surrendering everything useful that came before it.
What remains true even though someone I admire has disappointed me?
The good I received does not require a flawless giver.
For the A.A. nerds: Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Tradition Twelve; Twelve Concepts for World Service, Concept IX.